The Only Constant in Life, is Change
After my mom’s accident this Fall, the track of my life significantly changed. I flew 13 hours back from Hawaii leaving an apartment, a car, and two jobs. I moved to my hometown and into my parent’s house.“How did this happen?” I thought. I had consciously took hold of the reins of my life, but my well thought-out plan abruptly shifted. Shaken up, confused, and feeling an extreme loss of control. I went from being a fearless, world traveler, to a fear-stricken adult.
A strong reminder had been served - the only constant in life, is change. This accident reminded me that as much as I try, I do not have control over fate. I have control over my perceptions, actions, and thoughts. I can alter my reactions to life’s many changes. However, the fate of life - that is in someone else’s hand’s.
So why do we try all of our might to control the course of our lives? Things like our job, our relationships….we attach. We put so much pressure on life decisions. We become stuck in thought patterns believing if we go to X college instead of Y or take A job instead of B, we are safe. However, in the end, we land exactly where we are meant to be.
Why do we do this? Well, the thought of having absolutely no control over fate is so entirely overwhelming and scary, that we do whatever we can to convince ourselves we have a hand in the matter. It is human nature. It is easier to live life controlling external decisions instead of thinking about the big picture. It is a natural coping mechanism. The key is to remember, life is one big journey. Change teaches us lessons. Change is how we grow.
Although we may not be able to control what happens on the outside, we can learn from it and process it on the inside. Self-reflection and self-study creates resilience to any external change. Secure inside and it will never matter what happens outside.
Everything has a yin and a yang, a sun and a moon, a “good” and a “bad.” Let go of trying to control. Let go of thinking you are immune to change. Learn to embrace all aspects of life. To appreciate the “good” and understand the “bad.” To identify the pieces that lift you up and keep those in your life. To let go of self-created fears and self-sabotaging acts. Detach, knowing that your physical experience is only temporary. Live life to the fullest and look inside for peace.
Every life experience, even the traumatic ones, have their “good” and “bad.” Every life experience has a lesson. I am not quite sure who controls the crazy fate of life, or if anyone controls it at all. But what I do know is, I am the one who can embrace the crazy lessons of life with an open mind, a bigger perspective, and a compassionate heart. I am the one who can wake up every morning and decide to smile. To live with presence. To take another breath, gather some courage, and march on into the unknown.